Awakening
by Serymn
Summary: "You're so lonely, so afraid to leave. At night, desperate to sleep..." Kylo Ren probed her mind and knows Rey's intimate, most secret fears... her desires and longing as well. He didn't expect it would affect him more than it does her. (kind of pwp)


Awakening

AN: I'm a new fan of Star Wars, and I only watched the original trilogy after TFA. The lore is vast and the fandom is intimidating. My take on 'Kylo Ren and Rey during her kidnapping/interrogation'. However you might interpret that...

* * *

Rey's last memory had been the planet's burning, and she dreams of a man kneeling in front of her. When she opens her eyes at last, she saw that it wasn't a dream - that the dark blur of a man in her dream became stark clear. She was in a foreign ship, alone with a masked stranger. Then she realized she was bound in large metal constraints while on an interrogation chair. She didn't know which was more uncomfortable: that she was lying, completely helpless and against her will; or being alone in an enclosed room with a human male for the first time. Jakku was full of rogue aliens and occasional humans, but none of them stayed too long for Rey to know them. Someone used to crowds and open desert found this new environment restraining. That he might be of danger was another problem, and she's already thinking of all possible means of escape.

Except that for some odd reason, she felt safe. As if the man would not try to hurt her, no matter what. The masked face was oppressive to look at, but she felt some kind of… tenderness? Again, appearances can fool one. Her mind was springing into action, but she felt that every thought she had in this room was as bare as the expressions on her face.

The first sensible thing that occurs in her mind is to ask, "Where am I?" A strange, mechanical voice answers. "You're my guest."

"Where are the others?" she asks.

"You mean the murderers, traitors, and thieves you call friends? You'll be glad to hear I have no idea. You still want to kill me?" The masked man asks as if he's disappointed over the fact that she wants to hurt him. She wants to answer him, _isn't the answer obvious?_ If someone's chasing after you with the intention of hurting or capturing you, the most sensible thing to do was to fight or run.

"That's what happens when you're being hunted by a creature with a mask," she answers.

He takes off his mask for her to see his face. She's shocked by this, that he would just show his face so easily. She had imagined a face so disfigured or horrible, but the soft face, dark hair, and soulful eyes were the last thing she expected to see. If she met him in another circumstance, she might have thought his face handsome.

"Tell me about the droid," he demands. She answers fast with the specifications of the BB8, all she knows. He's looking for the map, one she had glimpsed once and thought was unimportant.

Then he moved near her, their faces almost touching. She was being interrogated, but a cold unfamiliar sensation ran through her whole body. Images of men and women flashed through her mind, only lovers could be as close as this, and this man was an enemy. She can feel his breath on her cheek. The speed of her breath and heartbeat was not only from the fear but his nearness…

Rey flinched and moved from her awkward, tight position, but there was no escape.

"You know I can take whatever I want?"

He meant to take whatever he can from her mind. She can feel the first pull of her thoughts as if someone was trying to force a door open. She didn't know where it came from or how exactly it was done, but she tried with all her heart and mind to make him stop, to cease this control over her.

Tears welled up in her eyes as he spoke of her most intimate, secret fears.

"You're so lonely, so afraid to leave. At night, desperate to sleep, you imagine an ocean…"

Those were an uncomfortable choice of words, but she still tried to hold back actual memories.

"Don't be afraid. I feel it too."

He's so near her now, and she moved her face away because if she's looking directly into his face and eyes, it would look more intimate and feel really awkward with her position on something that vaguely looks like a bed. Through her peripheral vision, she can see and feel his gaze, looking intently at her skin. Those eyes caressing her face and her body with what looked like desire and not a means of extracting useful information. She wants it to stop, but at the same time, she found herself slightly moved by the attention. It's the first time anyone ever looked at her that way. Can he sense that from her mind? Living alone in a broken, half-sunken space-ship, with no one to interact with in the sands of Jakku… this near, he felt so warm, what more if he's pressing his skin against hers…

She felt him probe her thoughts, and in an effort to suppress his control, she soon found that she could use the same force on him. All of a sudden, his mind was clear to her. It's his memories now that she can contact… images of the familiar skull of a man who was the dreaded terror of the galaxy, the mask they had feared now molten and broken… what remains of Darth Vader sitting on a bed of ash in one scene, cradled in this man's very hands in another. This dreadful man, who called her friends thieves and murderers, who dared read and enter her very mind. Now, even if she was bound - she found the strength to say the truth of what she found inside of him.

"You," she speaks, almost spits it out, "You're afraid," and her sudden force from her earlier tears made him step back, his eyes wide. His trick was used against him.

"That you'll never be as strong as Darth Vader!"

The bond broke, and his hold on her vanished. It felt as if an invisible wall fell heavy between them, separating the link that he held. He's just as shocked as she is. He storms off the room, furious in his surprise.

Rey is left alone, now letting the tears fall freely. She let them dry on her skin, her hands were restrained and she couldn't wipe them off. Inside her, she feels grief – not only for her captivity but also for him. Those words. Don't be afraid, I feel it too. And Rey felt it too, how he fully understood her pain because he felt the same. But she willed hatred inside her heart. She closed her eyes, the impact of seeing into another's mind, the feeling that her mind and memories were violated… she was drained of energy. She fell asleep.

After a good berating from Snoke about that girl – Kylo Ren entered the room where she was. She's sleeping, but there were wet streaks of tears on her cheeks. He hovered his gloved hand above her eyes, ever so softly. He sensed it, the same images and dreams as he had seen earlier. A wave of his hand, and her dreams turned black and she fell to the deepest of sleep.

* * *

He can't help but stare. She's sleeping, but she still looks troubled. He changes the angle of the reclining chair, and the mechanical contraption changes into an acceptable bed. He adjusted the restraints and they opened and disappeared with a click, freeing Rey's bound arms and feet. This girl had broken his hold on her – and he never felt the Force this strong on anyone, not even himself. She needed a good teacher and proper training, and she'll make a strong warrior. The Order could make good use of someone like Rey. He could be her teacher, there's no one else who can teach her but him, he'll have to do something to convince her…

He leaves the room, giving Rey a last glance before the door closes and feels a strange pang of something like possessiveness.

In his sparse room, Kylo Ren took off his mask and washed his face on the bathroom sink. The bedroom and bathroom were blank, stainless steel and grey. Rey's interrogation room was next to his. He lies on his bed even if his mind was so far from sleep. There's only a wall separating them. At this very moment, she's breathing and sleeping, dreaming troubled dreams.

Rey. This is the first time someone saw right through his mind. This is the first time that finally, just maybe, someone can understand him –

* * *

Rey wakes up to the smell of food. She's lying down, her hands and feet unbound. She saw a small table with food beside her. She stood up to sit on the chair and examine the food. She might have stuffed herself full immediately if not for the feeling that she was being watched. She scanned the room, but there were no visible exits. The utensils were fragile plastic. Her empty stomach grumbled in hunger – she hasn't eaten anything since yesterday. The desire for food went stronger than her pride and she ate. As she finished, a wall opened, revealing another bare chamber.

Kylo Ren, unmasked, stood there, and Rey didn't move. The door closed and locked itself again.

"Is your breakfast acceptable?" he asked.

"I wonder why its necessary."

"You are my guest, after all. Today, I must extract information from you again. Please cooperate."

Before Rey could answer, the chair she was sitting on clamped mechanical restraints on her hands and feet. The chair swiveled to face Kylo Ren, and the only difference from yesterday is she's sitting on a chair, not reclining on a weird angle. Rey tried with all her might to penetrate his mind once again, but his eyes were hard. Is this some trick she wasn't still aware of? Her ability surprised her yesterday. Now, she didn't know anything about it at all. It seems that she has entirely forgotten it. Her body was still, paralyzed.

Again, that familiar feeling of him probing her mind.

"Ah, I _see_ it now," Kylo Ren said with nonchalance. Rey trembled with tears. He had laid her mind bare. She was weak, there was nothing she can do about it. The Resistance will think of alternatives, is there any way she can let them know and get there before the First Order does? Now what will Kylo Ren do about her now that he got what she needed?

She cannot cry in front of him. She stopped it, but she had no way of hiding the tears already shed.

"There's no need to cry," he said, and the utter tenderness in his words made Rey's throat hitch. "I see it… your loneliness. The cold nights. Imagining someone…"

Rey hisses, now angry, trying to dredge power within herself but unable to. "Stop it. It has nothing to do with the droid. Now that you got what you needed from me, will you let me go?"

"Yes, it doesn't matter now, you can never do anything anymore. Right at this moment we are moving and it will be too late for you and your friends. Would it be better to stay here, than see their fate?"

Rey only glares.

"Your power surprised me. Have you wondered what that is? Would you like someone to show you the way? Your potential… enormous. It would be great to see it reach its heights. You need a teacher. I… can show you the way to the Force."

Rey still does not answer.

"I will give you time to think about it. I will be back," Kylo Ren says before leaving. With a wave of a hand, all her restraints fell, but the door shut close again.

* * *

 _I see it… your loneliness. The cold nights. Imagining someone…_

How could those bare words replay so madly inside her mind? Rey was no stranger to touching herself. But that night, it was a small comfort being alone in this cold room. It was difficult for a young girl growing up in a small planet… and she found that the room had no other visible door than a small opening for a bathroom. A glass on the sink and a decent shower. She had to do something about the walls, find an opening, figure a way out.

She placed a hand between her legs for warmth. It was too late now. She had thought the monotony of her life in Jakku would change with her friends in the Resistance, but she's here, a prisoner with an uncertain fate.

Trying to arouse her own flesh wasn't going to be effective in a place like this. _At night, desperate to sleep_ … It did help her sleep. Looking back made her cringe. Muffled moans echoing inside the empty, abandoned ship she called home. _Imagining someone…_ it couldn't be helped. She figured that even if she was a scavenger, she was still human, still female. The lonely mind can come up with fantasies of water and oases in a blank desert. That's what she had. A companion in the mind, to keep her from going mad. Isn't this some rare, secret fantasy in a cold evening? Some knight, strong and kind, kneeling at her door?

She didn't know it then. How those eyes, dark hair, a cruel expression that can also show mercy and kindness… she didn't know then how those could thrill her. Is this prison better than excruciating loneliness? She couldn't have these thoughts about him, of all people in all the galaxies… Her mind willed it away, but her body couldn't.

So she gave in. Some dream fantasy couldn't hurt, right? It was only inside her mind. It will not affect reality anyway. If it will only make her tired enough for sleep. She imagines his face. Dark birds against a midnight blue sky. The hand on her cheek. How she longed for touch. It was so near, the sensation of warmth emanating from him, it made her swoon to think about it again…

It felt strangely better than her own fumblings in the middle of the desert nights. The basis of what she imagined before was pure fantasy, but the memory of strong limbs carrying her and cradling her close was enough to make her forget her reality even for a brief time.

* * *

Kylo Ren shifted and turned in his bed. He can sever the link, he can choose not to read her mind, but his body can't help it. Her fantasies were practically screaming in his head, those swimming, confused images. Of him. With her. She's in her bed, just next to the wall beside his own. She's focusing on her fantasy, unaware of him. Its private, he knows, and he shouldn't be spying, but his shirt is sticking to his back and oh, how he wants what she imagined him doing.

It was since he touched her. Since he read her mind. She didn't know how strongly she affected him, how she invaded his thoughts, dreams, his every waking moment. He was older than her, and he had lived without these all-too-human feelings for most of his life until he found her and carried her to his world.

He stands up, delirious. Imagining wasn't enough. She wanted this as much as he wants. He slipped through a secret door and watched her in the dark. She was fisting her blanket, eyes shut and whispering, _Ren_.

* * *

"I'm here," he said. She gasps and her eyes opened in shock. Even in the dark, he can almost see the blush on Rey's cheeks. She looked down, as if guilty.

"How long have you been standing there watching me?" Rey asks, her voice shaking, eyes choked with tears. Kylo Ren was wearing a simple grey shirt and dark trousers for sleep.

"I wasn't. I was here just this moment, when I felt you calling out to me. Please do not cry," he said, and as he attempted to wipe her tears off she slapped his hand away. With the force, he gently placed Rey's hands on her own face, and softly moved the fingers to touch the tears away.

Rey felt her hand move, but not to her own accord. For once, she didn't mind his soft control. His eyes assured her nothing will ever go wrong.

He didn't touch her, but his hand hovered above her hand as he made her touch herself. He guided her with the force. Her own hands were stripping her own clothes off, clothes sticking into her skin from her sweat. She felt his eyes travel along the skin she was revealing, and she swallowed, completely helpless to his will and his eyes. If she wanted this to stop, she had stopped him moments ago. If she told him to stop, she knew he would. She let her mind open for him, she let him read her like a book. There were no memories he would find there, just her focusing on this moment. Then she also felt his mind willingly ready for her intrusion, and she merely found him wanting and curious about her…

She was the only one naked and explored, and Ren didn't touch her… he let the force of his mind dictate the actions of her body. Rey's mind and body was slack, but her hands were working on its own accord guided by him. Instead of feeling embarrassed, she let all feelings go. It was strange, her touching herself through him.

Kylo Ren sat on the bed with his back to the headboard, Rey lying on him with her head on his chest and body between his legs, helpless. Rey watched his hands hover above her own touching her own skin, it was kind of fascinating how his fingers mimicked a puppet master's, moving invisible strings that controlled her hand.

He let her touch and soothe the scars on her body, feel the ribs through her own skin, a hollow stomach and the slow caress at the soft insides of her thighs… it was slow, so slow, and though Rey wanted to get it fast, Ren wanted to savor every moment of this. Her hands drew circles around her wet center, and Ren used his other hand to guide her free hand to touching and squeezing her own breasts. She arched her back against his chest. Kylo Ren fastens his mouth to her shoulder and rains the skin of neck with kisses. It's the first time someone's lips touch her skin, and it's also the first time for him to kiss someone else. Rey says his name again and his lips on her skin didn't feel _enough,_ so she turned around and took initiative for the first time by sealing her mouth on his. A real kiss felt warmer than either of them thought.

He let her kiss him. For this time, in this room, they forgot about everything else - Poe and Finn and the Resistance, for Ren, his family and the Order and their purpose. It was the first time either of them kissed anyone. Rey was the first to let go. She lay down on the body of her enemy, now her lover just for this time, free of restrictions and reminders of the outside world or of outer space.

It was no longer Kylo whose force moved her hand, it was her own wildness and wanting, she plays with her fingers as he watched. He was fascinated with the reactions of her body. She moved her hips against her own hands, moaning freely, as he kisses her back, her nape, her ears. _Please, touch me,_ she begs silently through their shared connection, and he does as she told.

He touches her sensitive places, and she spreads her legs open for his hands. He touches her, and her reactions are becoming more fervent as it was his actual flesh and blood hands touching her, not controlling her own hands through the force. Another person, touching her, pleasuring her, kissing her, in her wildest dreams never had she imagined the real thing would be better. She still wasn't sure what she was doing, she sensed his same cluelessness but the same desire that needs to be filled. His other hand wrapped around her waist, keeping her in place.

Soon, his thicker, beautiful fingers coaxed her into a dizzying climax. He removed one of his hands from her to touch himself. Some of his come staining Rey's skin. He wipes it off.

"I wanted to touch you too," Rey said, and they kiss again. He was the first one to look at her bare body, and everything they did tonight felt… so natural.

She wouldn't admit it out loud, but a part of her enjoyed being controlled. She takes her clothes and puts them on again. Kylo Ren looked into her eyes with sadness.

"Rey. I will let you go soon. Snoke is uncontrollable and powerful… you better go before he senses you. Go. Back to Jakku, to wherever the galaxy takes you. It is not safe for you here."

"So soon?"

"Tomorrow morning, get ready."

Rey looks down.

"You will always feel me, through the force. I will return to you," he said. "I hope your dark nights won't be so lonely anymore."

He stands up to leave for his room. Rey cried for no reason, she just cries every time it felt as if someone will abandon her, just like how the people who took her to Jakku abandoned her. Kylo rushes back to her side. "Soon, I promise. Once we conquer the galaxies. I cannot touch you again until then… but remember this night." Kylo kisses her for the last time.

The next morning, he leads her to a small ship she can drive herself. She walks behind Kylo Ren, now masked.

"Do not go back," are his last words to her. She doesn't spare him a glance, lest emotion and tears might surge once again. As she flies to empty space at full speed, he reminds her of his promise. _Soon, I will have you. Soon._


End file.
